yamashyn on DeviantArthttps://www.deviantart.com/yamashyn/art/--543468444yamashyn

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I just got back from the hospital. Well turn out, my mood disorder comes back and haunts me again orz
Anyway, I got some notes from people I haven't known before asking if I need help. Thank you so much for your concern. I'm really happy to know there are people reading these below stuff ha ha. I'm sorry I couldn't reply you all cuz my headaches make it hard for me to concentrate on things. But thank you so so much again!
I'll try to control my feelings andback to "normal" life soon ;_;

Hope you have nice week

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I'm sorry I'd hurted you I'm sorry for all the pains you've been through I'm sorry for turning out this way I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry

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I'm on the verge of isolating myself from everything again.
These days I'm tired af. I can't eat and lost nearly 4 kg in the first week of my summer break. I can't even sleep, only 2 - 3 hours a day. Everyday I do nothing but commissions, commissions, commissions, and commissions. And feel like everyone and everthing around annoying the fuck out of me... (is this how girls feel when they're on their periods?).

Not to mention I keep seeing weird illusions. Then whenever I sleep I'll dream of my past self staring at me. I just wanna run toward and hug "myself" then cry like a fucking baby. This's been haunting me for 3 weeks now.

Welp generally I'm feeling depressed these days. But I can't talk to anyone about my problems because for some reasons, if I open my mouth I'll make up a joke then say my problems "not a big deal"... every-fucking-days.

*sigh* So I draw this to relieve stresses then back to commissions again. Hope tonight I can sleep for more than 3 hours o(-(
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Comments9
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CianRhapsody's avatar
....Controlling your feelings isn't the point...

It's about nurturing yourself and learning to love yourself as damaged as you are so the feelings have less power over you ;-;

People care... Even if it's just random folks on the net. Those of us who have suffered these feelings and grown past them want to help others survive them and learn to thrive.

St. John's wort and licorice root are powerful herbal anti-depressants. Citrine, rutilated quartz, and rose quartz will all help too if you keep them on your person, in your room, or in a backpack/art supply bag

Never give up, Never Surrender - Galaxy Quest